Tell me about a time when you had a conflict with a coworker and how you resolved it

The answer to this question is not, “I’ve never had a conflict.” Inevitably, conflicts arise in the workplace, and employers want to know that you will be able to resolve them effectively. The best situations to talk about in response to this question deal with work-related (not personal) conflicts.

For example, you might describe a time where you and a colleague differed on your approach to an assignment. Then, explain the steps you took to come to an agreement. The anecdote should not end with a description of who “won,” but rather how you reached a compromise with your colleague.

This question illustrates why it is so important to prepare for tough interview questions—while you may be able to rattle off a list of colleagues who irk you at a moment’s notice, it is much more difficult to come up with a concrete example of a conflict that ended well. Think back on all the projects you have worked on—a “conflict” doesn’t necessarily have to be heated or argumentative to qualify as an answer to this question.

It’s also important to understand that, with this question, your interviewer is trying to find out how you work with others, to see whether you surmount challenging work dynamics or flounder under them. In your answer, do not focus on what the other person did wrong, but rather on what you did to overcome the issue in order to successfully complete the task at hand. Whether that was setting up meetings to hold a procrastinating co-worker accountable for making deadlines, or agreeing to compromise on an issue to manage differing viewpoints, you should aim to demonstrate your willingness to take the initiative and your ability to work well on a team.

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At Snagajob, we’re compiling a vault of resources geared toward helping you answer the toughest interview questions (see: all of them!). If you haven’t already, be sure to take a look at our other interview-related posts:

1. How to Answer, “Where Would You Like to Be in 5 Years?”

2. How to Answer the Question “Tell Me About a Time You Worked on a Team” Like an All-Star 

Let’s be honest – no one really enjoys these pesky interview questions, right? The same ones come about so often that they’re almost expected when you walk into an interview. But if this is the case, then why are these top interview questions still so hard to answer? 

There are a lot of reasons, really. Mostly, though, it falls upon the nerves of interview day and the seemingly difficult time that most of us have talking about ourselves. 

And, sorry to disappoint, but…today’s interview preparation comes in the form of another question. In our constant pursuit of providing you with interview questions and answers, we’re tackling:

“Tell me about a time you disagreed with a coworker.”

What Not to Do

Given the fact that a job interview is a big deal, let’s start with the big do nots. It’s important to understand that when an interviewer asks this specific question, he/she isn’t looking for the TMZ or The Real World: Miami detail-by-detail account. 

All your interviewer wants to know is whether or not you’re a team player and capable of resolving minor issues that may arise.

That’s it. People are people. We disagree with each other sometimes. The best of us manage to channel that disagreement into productive remediation and growth. 

DO NOT answer this question with:

"I don't usually have disagreements with coworkers because it's my way or the highway. I can't help if my ideas are better than everyone else's."

Great. This tells your employer that you are unadaptable and unappreciative of others’ talents. No one wants to work with someone who refuses the ideas and opinions’ of others. 

"If I have a disagreement, I will go directly to my manager. I don't like confrontation, it makes me anxious."

Sometimes a manager does have to get involved, but remember what we said above. This question isn’t about the TMZ-worthy spectacle that happened on March 8, 2002 in the employee lounge over a can of Sprite and a slight against someone’s inability to properly use Microsoft Excel. 

Can you work in a team? Do you have enough conflict resolution capability so that a manager doesn’t always have to get involved? In this example, the interviewee has pretty much admitted that he/she can’t resolve a conflict. In fact, this person runs away from it!

"I never disagreed with a coworker, but I have had one disagree with me before. After I told them I would beat them up if it happened again, we didn't seem to have any more issues."

Need we say anything about this aggressive example?

The key is to show that you can overcome small conflicts without involving your boss or interrupting the flow of the workplace. Your answer should reflect your professionalism and your ability to maintain your temper.

Workplace conflicts may happen every now and then and that's okay. Prove to your interviewer that you handled them correctly and moved forward.

Answering the Right Way

Here’s an appropriate answer to the question. Let it soak in…we’ll come back to it soon.

"Once, a co-worker and I disagreed on the way an unsatisfied customer was dealt with. I decided to meet with them one on one to talk and resolve our dispute in a peaceful manner. We both agreed that our goal was to keep the customer happy and came to a compromise that consisted of both of our ideas."

Job interview questions fall into several different categories. “Tell me about a time you disagreed with a co-worker” is an example of a behavioral interview questions. Others you might’ve encountered in the past (or could face in a future interview) include:

• Describe a challenging goal that you set and explain how it was achieved.

• Describe a situation in which you had to work under pressure. How did you navigate and minimize stress?

• Tell me about a mistake that you made – how did you handle it?

The reason these are all classified as “behavioral” is because they ask you to explain how you’ve behaved in past work situations. 

Again, no TMZ account here, but behavioral questions do ask for specificity. That’s why one of the best ways you can build your individual interview skills is by being prepared ahead of time. In other words – do your homework. Use our interview question guides to give yourself a sense of what to expect, as well as to start planning your responses. 

Keep in mind that a job’s description can give a pretty good sense of what might be asked. For example, do you see words like strategic, detail-oriented, and/or organized when reading through what the job entails? If so, chances are you’ll be getting behavioral-based questions in your interview. 

Expecting these (and preparing for them beforehand) is the perfect way to walk into your interview with confidence and zeal.

Using the STAR Method 

If you’re an avid Snagajob blog reader, then you’ve probably encountered the STAR method before. Maybe you’ve even used it in a job interview? 

Regardless, we tend to bring up STAR a lot because it’s a fantastic, storytelling-based approach to interview questions. And when it comes to job interview tips, using STAR is one of the best we can give.

So, for the new and uninitiated, what is the STAR method? 

STAR boils down to Situation, Task, Action, and Result. It’s an effective framework for delivering an equally effective answer. Plus, many interview questions cater to STAR-based answers. 

Worth it.

Situation

Quickly describe the situation. It’s best to focus on a specific moment, like an event or a team project. 

Task

Explain the goal or task you worked toward. Think of this as the point in the narrative where you faced a challenge, deadline, or obstacle. 

Action

Detail how you worked with the team to tackle your challenge. Be very specific, listing the steps you took to solve the problem.

Result

What was the outcome of your team’s venture? At this point, specificity is your best friend. Use specific examples with specific numbers, if possible. The result should show how you’re an all-star team player.

Let’s look back at the sample answer to our focus question.

"Once, a co-worker and I disagreed on the way an unsatisfied customer was dealt with. I decided to meet with them one on one to talk and resolve our dispute in a peaceful manner. We both agreed that our goal was to keep the customer happy and came to a compromise that consisted of both of our ideas."

Do you see STAR in play?

Situation

An unsatisfied customer needed to be taken care of. 

Task

In thinking about how to handle the customer’s dissatisfaction, there was disagreement over the methodology. Admittedly, this portion of the response could be better explained (or the situation detailed just a bit more). 

Action

Instead of taking a “My way or the highway approach,” this employee met with his/her colleague individually and resolved the dispute in a peaceful manner. 

Result

Together, the pair came to a compromise, both acknowledging that they were working toward the same goal of keeping the customer happy. 

Ready to Interview?

Plenty of people search for “how” to answer interview questions or the “best” interview answers. Just remember that the best interview answers come from a place of personal experience. 

You are the captain of your journey, and by incorporating something like the STAR method into your approach, as well as diligently researching the position you’re applying for and taking note of various descriptors (strategic, detail-oriented, organized, etc.), you’ll do just fine on gameday. 

In the meantime, Snagajob is here to help. Be sure to continue reading through our collection of posts for job interview tips, career advice, and all things related to “The Search.”

You got this!

How do you answer Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a coworker?

How did you handle a conflict with a coworker answer?

How do you answer Tell me about a time you had a conflict?

How do you answer Give an example of a time you handled conflict in the workplace?